You've Got To Learn The Lingo!

Being a girl and actually liking football genuinely shocks guys. Their jaws literally drop.
Being a girl and being able to understand the lingo of football genuinely shocks guys too. They literally have heart attacks.

So, the universal language of lads can seem pretty much like an alien speaking, particularly for the uninitiated.
Here are a few key phrases to help you make sense what the commentators are babbling on about:
'Holding up the ball' - We're not talking about tight boxers here, but a players ability to keep the ball and not lose it in a tackle, (tackle is not what you think either!)
'Nutmeg' - not the spice, but the move where one player kicks the ball between the legs of an opposing player.

'Tricky Brazilian' - This is not some painful grooming procedure, it's a skillful player from South America.

Once you've mastered the basics, try slotting something like the following into your conversation, "Let's hope Capello's insistence on a rigid 4-4-2 structure instead of a diamond formation doesn't limit our central attacking options. I'd have gone with the 4-5-1." (This means how the manager, Fabio Capello, has decided to play the team, with so many at the front, in the middle and at the back of the pitch.)

Katee.